My buddies and I joined an after-school football team. Oh, I think you call it "foursquare" over there, is that right? How confusing. Anyway, my mom says I spend way too much time playing video games (I like World of Warfare 7 the best), so I have to play outside so I don't get fat. Whatever! I only weigh 2300 candygrams. I'm not sure how that converts to whatever weight you guys use.

You'll never guess what my buddy Georgie Levine showed me after school today. He had this magazine that he said his dad keeps hidden under a mattress, and he totally stole it. So, he opens the magazine and there's this big fold-out poster in the middle, and... The poster was this big list of instructions for stealing stamps. I don't know why you'd hide a magazine like that, and I'm not sure why I was so disappointed. Go fig.