Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Ponytail Garrett, the Strong

Hot: Brimstone Woody Garfunkel

Cold: Barney "Really Cold Extremities" Lewis, the Meat Popsicle

Stench: Jack Sullivan, the Rotten-Egg-Tosser

Spooky: Uncanny-Valley John "Braaaain-Cravin'" Mack

Sleazy: Single-Entendre Victor Nite

Crimbo: Jelly-Filled Shekkyellas "Blisters" Giftwrapper

The Hoboverlord sez: Napoleon gave me a trolley once. Look out... ARE you Grandma?

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