Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Unsteady Grant, the Monkey Man

Hot: Burninatin' Bix, Who Is Hot Because He's Fly

Cold: R. T. "Frigid Jim" Adams

Stench: Outhouse Ricky, the Sewer-Bather

Spooky: Cal Shafer, the Guy Who Likes Corpses a Little Too Much, If You Know What I Mean

Sleazy: Slippery Shemp Brooks

Crimbo: Toy-Doll-Makin' Jakeorm "Puddin'" Ribbonwinder, the Carol Crooner

The Hoboverlord sez: Shhhhhh... Have... YOU SEEN... Mr. Symington? Grandma, Grandma, eat... the trains.

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