Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Fine-Nipple Stephen, the Salad Shooter

Hot: Dunstan Mills, the Human Campfire

Cold: Avalanche Brucie, the Polar Hobo

Stench: Frederick "Gas-Passin'" Garfield

Spooky: Elizabeth "Skullface" Garfunkel

Sleazy: Touchy-Feely Lewis Mills

Crimbo: Joy-to-the Cliveroth Turducken, the White Crimbo Dreamer

The Hoboverlord sez: CAN'T find it. Can't find the radio. Hmmmmmmm... Lost the junks. Mama's gonna be mad.

Generate some more