Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Frederick Jones, the Star-Traveler

Hot: Brendan "Arson" Nicholson

Cold: Hypothermic Grant, the Abominable Hobo

Stench: Clayton "Spitstink" Berry

Spooky: Zombified Charlie "Goosepimples" Huxtable, the Cemetery Casanova

Sleazy: Lewd Louis "Leisure-Suit" Garfield, the Bad Toucher

Crimbo: Thaddriel Giftwrapper, Who Lets It Snow

The Hoboverlord sez: Are you The Pope? One time... Too many telephones.

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