Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Clyde "Bud" Capulet, the Drunk

Hot: Boiling Louis Nichols

Cold: Molly Young, the Meat Popsicle

Stench: Jedediah "Sardine-Breath" Spitzner, the Unidentifiable Smell

Spooky: J. R. "Chain-Rattlin'" Lennon, the Empty Eye Socket

Sleazy: Tomas "Lingering Hug" Johnson, the Pocket Pool Shark

Crimbo: Theodorerond "Candy Cane" Toypacker, the Reindeer Groomer

The Hoboverlord sez: It's Mr. Zevon, MR. Zevon... is... Psssst... Where's my lamp?

Generate some more