Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Dandy "Tarantula" Belvedere

Hot: Jack Salisbury, the Devil's Pitchfork

Cold: Molly Goldthwait, the Pennsylvania Snowman

Stench: Virgil Nipperus, Who Has Never Bathed Ever

Spooky: Dreadful Davenport Simon

Sleazy: Off-Color Updike, the Bottom Pincher

Crimbo: Fruitcake-Eatin' Claytonras Horsecarver

The Hoboverlord sez: Have you seen... Ralph Hathaway? Play with the circus?

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