| After the entire village of Klatch was murdered, including your wife and dad, you vowed to get your revenge. You became a mighty Fighter, albeit one who was easily distracted by sidequests. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Cold Crick. There, you met the town crier's nubile son, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Gold Marmot. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. At first it was a real breeze, up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a lava pool and a sphere of annihilation, with a cockatrice bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your eye. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's tower, dispatching lizardmen left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Dark Witchlord Xxyrg. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your longbow into his leg. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil bozo was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Febreezia.
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