| After the entire village of Sto Lat was murdered, including your niece and grandpa, you vowed to get your revenge. You became a mighty Fighter, albeit one who was easily distracted by sidequests. One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Pig-in-a-Poke when you met the town chambermaid. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Duke of Claremont's comely daughter, who had been kidnapped by jocks. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. Everything was hunky-dory up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a lava pool and a spiked pit, with a rust monster bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your giblets. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's strip mall, dispatching tramps left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Vampire Barbarian Mephistor. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your yo-yo into his arm. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil pig was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Nickelodeon.
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