| You grew up on the great streets of the great Emerald City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Morcestecershire in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Shaffly-on-Surrey you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Grand Vizier's ugly grandfather had been kidnapped by goblins, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. It wasn't a thing but you soon were confounded by a fiendish guess-which-of-these-bottles-is-poison puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were mad as an underfed earwig. However, you managed to overcome the odds (and your injuries), and after a lengthy crawl through a tomb infested with gunslingers, you finally came upon the lair of the Fire Devil Lord Mawmoose, who was guarding the object of your quest. The evil fiend fell before your "Rod of Lordly Might" (if you know what I mean), and the land was finally free of his foul shenanigans. You made your way back to civilization, and basked in the glory of your success (and the reward money).
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