| As a baby you were stolen from your parents by a band of barbarians and raised in a dark and wild mansion. They regarded you as one of their own, but the time came for you to make your own name as a professional Thief. As luck would have it, as you were passing through the land of Keaton, you stopped at the inn in the quiet hamlet of Mudhole, and heard the local bard talking about the ancient sewer that the town had (perhaps ill-advisedly) been built next to, and the fantastic Topaz Idol of Venomfist that was purported to be hidden there. Without bothering to ask why nobody had managed to recover it already, you set out on your very first quest. You were kickin' ass and chewin' bubblegum but you soon were confounded by a fiendish mine crafting puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were agitated as an underfed earwig. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Ice Warlock Slicestrong held court over his horde of skeletal tramps, and with uncountable swings of your crossbow (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible slack-jawed yokel and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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