We had some guy from the college come today and talk about pledging Kappa Sigma Iota, the big fraternity over there. I said I had enough friends without buying any, which was pretty funny, until he said he could tell that wasn't true just looking at me. It would've been okay if my former best friend Todd Snider had stuck up for me. Whatever. I have friends! I've got you, anyway.

Me and Ricky and Margie were out in the woods looking for more sticks for our neat fort and you'll never guess what we saw! Go ahead, guess! Oh, right. Anyway, we saw a dead body. I poked it with a stick, and it turned over, and we all ran and ran. I guess we ought to call the cops, but I figure they'll find him eventually anyway.