It must be real exciting to get to fight ogres and monsters all the time! I've only ever seen one ogre -- Mr. Hernandez, my Geography teacher. He's got a big pot belly and snaggly teeth and hair growing out of his ears and he's real grumpy all the time, so I'm pretty sure he's an ogre. He made me stay after class and muck out the blackboard because I couldn't remember the name of some dumb river. If you're ever in town, I'll find out where he lives so you can hit him with your sword. That'll teach him! Ha ha ha, see what I did there?

Me and Jeffy spent a few hours working on our great tree fort yesterday. We're almost done with the torture chamber and we're working on laser-guided missiles to keep the girls out.