It must be real exciting to get to fight ogres and monsters all the time! I've only ever seen one ogre -- Mr. Bradshaw, my Geography teacher. He's got a big pot belly and snaggly teeth and hair growing out of his ears and he's real grumpy all the time, so I'm pretty sure he's an ogre. He made me stay after class and mop the blackboard because I couldn't remember the name of some dumb river. If you're ever in town, I'll find out where he lives so you can hit him with your sword. That'll teach him! Ha ha ha, see what I did there?

Jamie Ferguson asked me to go to the Sladie Thompkins dance with her. I haven't decided. She's alright, I guess. She's funny, and kind of cute. It's better than not being asked at all. I'd rather go with Ainsleigh Williamson, but she's going out Mr. Bigshot kickball star Brayden Villarreal, so fat chance of that. He thinks he's so cool, but he's a huge jerk. I don't know what she sees in him.