I still have to mop the chicken coop to earn my allowance, and I usually blow it on comic books and bubble gum. My favorite comic right now is The Exploits of Ash Drake -- I can't believe the stuff he gets up to every month!

So there's this new kid in school, Vinnie "Two-Teeth" Ellison, and he says his dad's a real-live hobo from the Kingdom of Loathing! Have you ever fought any hobos? I'll bet I could take a hobo if I had to. I mean, if I really totally had to. Especially if I could bring my favorite Pokëmann, Twitter.