We had to write a book report for school, so I did mine on issue 3 of Spine-Tingling Tales of Biff Sloan. It's my favorite one coz it's the first appearance of The Moon Object. Mrs. Rutledge said that wasn't appropriate material for a book report and gave me a D. She's just jealous coz all the books she has to read are really boring! I bet she's never even heard of The Nameless Pirates!

My buddies and I joined an after-school rugby team. Oh, I think you call it "football" over there, is that right? How confusing. Anyway, my mom says I spend way too much time playing video games (I like World of Black 7 the best), so I have to play outside so I don't get fat. Whatever! I only weigh 4000 candygrams. I'm not sure how that converts to whatever weight you guys use.

My dad went a little crazy last night and painted my whole room buff. And I mean the *whole* room. So now my sheets are all stiff and everything smells like wet paint. Do you know how to get paint off of a video game? I'm seriously jonesing without my Splatter Island 6 -- I mean, I just unlocked the variant Amber Mount before all this happened!