We had to take a physical fitness test in school today. It sucked! I had to run laps until I felt like my appendix was going to explode, and then I couldn't do any pull-ups and Coach Taylor called me a loser. I'll bet he's just mad that he didn't make the basketball team when he was in school, the jerk.

Today Jack McConnell came over after school and I showed him my pet Vietnamese pot-bellied pig, Duke. He said that was a dumb name and said I should've named it Mr. Snugglesworth, but what does he know? He named his pet puppy Mrs. Snugglesworth, and that's just ridiculous.