Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Boxcar Roy, the Salad Shooter

Hot: Stan Harris, the Coal-Chucker

Cold: Frozen Rufus, the Freezerburn Kid

Stench: Nauseatin' Manuel Harrison, the Human Paper Mill

Spooky: Rigor Mortis Sam, the Empty Eye Socket

Sleazy: Giancarlo White, the Grade School Loiterer

Crimbo: Judasborn Topspinner, the Sleigh Bell Polisher

The Hoboverlord sez: Can't find it. Can't find the... POCKETKNIFE. Mrs. Thompson, Mrs. Thompson, buy... the trolleys.

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