Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Judas Simon, the Train-Oyster

Hot: Fireball Jacky Roosevelt

Cold: Alex "Bluelips" Stemple, the Iceman who Cometh

Stench: John Mott, the Man Who Uses a Rotting Fish for Aftershave

Spooky: Putrefying Jacky, the Shambling Man

Sleazy: Louis Sullivan, the Free-Candy-Dispenser

Crimbo: Tobylas "Calendar Adventurer" Turkeybaster

The Hoboverlord sez: Gotta shuffle the mushroom. Lost the coats. Uncle Dennis's gonna be... mad.

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