Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Opie "Tarantula" Robinson

Hot: Alvin "Fireworks" Noriega

Cold: Snowcone Walter "Freezing Point" Berry

Stench: Theodore "Stinkpalm" Washington

Spooky: Ryan "Gives You the Jibblies" Williams

Sleazy: Naughty Earl "Leisure-Suit" Isaacson, the Guy Who Does Not Have a Pencil in His Pocket

Crimbo: Round Yon Billdir "Reindeer Gamer" Nutcracker, the Tree Trimmer

The Hoboverlord sez: HAVE you seen Little Sister? Too... many junks.

Generate some more