Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Collegeboy Elizabeth, the Mad Monk

Hot: Fire-Eatin' Pickles "Solar Flare" Thomas, the Inflammable Man

Cold: Abominable Patrick, the Earl of Frostbite

Stench: Halitosis Buck "Gag-A-Maggot" Pennington, the Guy Made Entirely Out of Onions Or At Least That's How He Smells

Spooky: Putrefying Shorty "Abracadaver" Jones

Sleazy: Well-Oiled Giles Stemple

Crimbo: Mikhailuvel "Mincemeat" Kiteflyer, the White Crimbo Dreamer

The Hoboverlord sez: Statues? HOW MANY... breakfasts. Hmmmmmmm...

Generate some more