Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Not-Quite-a-Quorum Joey, of the Hill People

Hot: Cthulhu "The Torch" Lee

Cold: Cold Feet John Taylor

Stench: P. T. "Underarms" Salisbury

Spooky: Putrescent Hilary Garcia

Sleazy: Sven "Greasy Ponytail" Sullivan

Crimbo: Gingerbread Emilos Fudgeboxer, Who May Or May Not Be Home For Crimbo

The Hoboverlord sez: Which... statue? Tell me which statue. TROLLEY, trolley, desk.

Generate some more