Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Frederick "Salisbury Steak" Jones

Hot: Flame-Broiled Manny, the Dry Heat

Cold: Anti-Anti-Freeze Ted Haggard

Stench: Garlic Eatin' Jacky "Sardine-Breath" Lee, Who Is Extremely Funky But Not In a Good Way

Spooky: Six-Feet-Under Larry Harris

Sleazy: Too-Much-Pomade Mikhail Lewis

Crimbo: Opierod "Sugarplum" Canecandier

The Hoboverlord sez: Radish? Shirt, toybox, shirt.

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