Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Foreign Simon Simon

Hot: Walter "The Back Burner" Steadwick, the Hobo On Fire

Cold: Reynaldo Wallace, the Hazy Shade of Winter

Stench: Nauseatin' Jonas, the Man Who Should Probably Change His Underwear, Like, Now

Spooky: Skeletonesque Ricky Pennington, Who Hides In The Shadows

Sleazy: Moist Willie "Shoe-Mirrors" Cooper, the Midnight Groper

Crimbo: Good King Holdenroth Stockingstuffer, the One Who Waits Under the Mistletoe

The Hoboverlord sez: The Pope? Circus?

Generate some more