Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Linty Craine "Curiously Dense" Sullivan

Hot: Brimstone Walter, Who Burns at Both Ends

Cold: Avalanche Elmer "Mr. Sleet" Shafer

Stench: Unwashed Jonsey Shatner

Spooky: Night of the Living Billy Bob "Soulless" Isaacson, the Crypt Creeper

Sleazy: Gropin' Ogilvy Brown, the Grade School Loiterer

Crimbo: Hilaryborn "Pepperminty" Dolldresser, the Reindeer Groomer

The Hoboverlord sez: Gotta watch the BOXCAR. Where's Mama?

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