Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Tooth-And-Nail Leonard Brown

Hot: White-Hot Arthur McMahon, the Human Barbecue

Cold: Frigid Arthur Harris

Stench: Dungheap Earl, the Human Paper Mill

Spooky: Deathly Larry McCartney

Sleazy: Oleaginous Edgar, the Cameraphone Panty-shot Taker

Crimbo: O Holy Cletusuil, the Polar Expressionist

The Hoboverlord sez: Hmmmmmmm... Weightlifters. WEIGHTLIFTERS... in THE desk. Where's my boxcar?

Generate some more