Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Dmitry "Salami Hog" Reynolds, the Enigma Machine

Hot: Wallace Peterson, the Heatstroke Kid

Cold: Noah "Snowball" Hall, the Earl of Frostbite

Stench: Garrett "Bad-Smellin' Saul" Nelson

Spooky: Dead Guy Horace Stemple, the Autopsist

Sleazy: Indecent Rufus Paulson

Crimbo: Roydreth "Reindeer Gamey" Sleighbeller, Who Came Upon the Midnight Clear

The Hoboverlord sez: I polished... the pastry, but... I did not wiggle the cup of coffee. Don't tell Grandpa.

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