Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Willie "Boxers" Thompson

Hot: Kelly "Firebrand" Brown, Who Is Hot Because He's Fly

Cold: Popsicle Ricky, the Hazy Shade of Winter

Stench: Cletus "Loo Brush" Noriega

Spooky: Uncanny-Valley Morris "Mass-Murderin'" Sullivan, the Galloping Ghoul

Sleazy: Larry "Peeping Tom" Williams

Crimbo: Nut-Crackin' Mannyroth "Pepperminty" Treetopper

The Hoboverlord sez: Are you Old... Man Martin? Careful... I'm looking for OLD Man BROWN.

Generate some more