Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Alvin Meadows, the Hobo in the Iron Mask

Hot: Manny "Blisterin'" Brown, the Walking Stove

Cold: Stan Goldthwait, the Human Zamboni

Stench: Frederick "Nauseating Bouquet" Shatner

Spooky: Skeletal Byron, the Shambling Man

Sleazy: Heavy-Breathing Peter Goodman

Crimbo: Eddiedreth Horsecarver, the Mistletoe Bandit

The Hoboverlord sez: Chair? Tell me... ICEBOX?

Generate some more