Meet the Hobos
(special thanks to John Hodgman)

Normal: Ralph "Gopher" Johnson

Hot: Sizzling Hubie Allen

Cold: Made-of-Ice R. J., the Prehistoric Iceman

Stench: Necrotic-Limb Mark "Awful Offal" Noriega

Spooky: Reasonably Frightening Buck Franklin

Sleazy: Lecherous Clive, the Moustache You Don't Trust

Crimbo: Gift-Wrappin' Shaneeri "Pudding" Wreathweaver, the Sleigh Bell Ringer

The Hoboverlord sez: Mama, Mama, finish THE PORCH... swings. I'm LOOKING for Little Sister.

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