| After your quiet hometown of Deaf Chicken was attacked by kobolds and, despite your young age, you were forced to take up arms to defend it, you decided that the life of a Fighter was the life you were looking for. It would be a long and difficult road, but it sure beat the heck out of being a village idiot like your uncle wanted. Having heard many rumors about how Flansburgh was being systematically sacked by a band of marauding gangsters (who had already looted and burned the villages of Pittsburgh, Whacking, and Madlib), and the ludicrous reward being offered for the ankle of their leader, you decided it was finally time to put your mettle to the test. At first it was a real breeze, until you got your face caught in a cookie jar and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your pike and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Frost Lawyer Grunwold's army of drunken jerks. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil dork into his own antlion pit, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Morcestecershire.
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