| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Waltermatthau, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a skeletal, ugly squire. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). In the fiefdom of Midnighthawk, in the unpleasant-smelling backwater of Klatch, you found an inn with cheap zima and spent the night carousing. There, you heard a tale of the forgotten treasure of the Ruby Mountains, lost for ages during the time of the great unpleasantness. You decided to seek the treasure yourself, heedless of the literal mountain of skeletons of those who had tried before you. Everything was hunky-dory until you got lost in a strip mall -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet shiv +1 in a flesh golem's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some badgers into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the giblets. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Blood King Badfella held court over his horde of bright-eyed skeletons, and with uncountable swings of your sack of doorknobs (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible douchenugget and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
|