Ever since you were a little boy, you wanted to become a mighty pirate and sail the seven seas, looting and plundering. Unfortunately, the country of Waxtoff is totally land-locked, so you had to settle for being a Thief.

One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Piehole when you met the town farmhand. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Poo-bah's squat stepsister, who had been kidnapped by gnolls. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest.

You were doing a good job but then you wandered into a room totally full of barbarians, plus a carrion crawler, which is weird because you would have figured they'd have killed each other. They made a pretty good attempt at killing you, though.

But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Blood Troll Badfella held court over his horde of underdeveloped badgers, and with uncountable swings of your sword (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible halfwit and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).

Loot:skinguard of frigid ale
gloves of miraculous barley wine
battleaxe of vampire control

Another!