Life was hard as an orphan on the streets of Dropseat, without a cousin or aunt to teach you right from wrong. On the other hand, you wouldn't have grown up to be such a talented Thief otherwise.

Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Pitlick. There, you met the Marquis of Taintingham's ugly niece, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Topaz Raven. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it.

You weren't having any problems up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a vending machine and a spiked pit, with a githyanki bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your lower back.

Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's sewer, dispatching gnolls left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Ice Sorcerer Mephistor. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your dagger into his eye. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil buttface was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Brazzleton.

Loot:leather leather backpack of unstoppable lightning
diamond-studded helm of bewildering infravision
helm of spiteful mediocrity

Another!