| You grew up on the wet streets of the great Amethyst City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. Your life changed one day, changed irrevocably -- and perhaps not for the better -- when you were wandering down the quaint bucolic dusty paths of the tiny farming village of Phlegm. There, you met the Poo-bah's nubile stepchild, who gave you broad hints as to the last known location of the long-lost Silver Shark. Recognizing the street value of such a rare treasure, you set off to find it. At first it was a real breeze, until you got your giblets caught in a meat grinder and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it. Fortunately, "giving up" isn't in your dictionary (probably because it's two words), so you persevered. You fought your way through countless gunslingers and kobolds -- even a rakshasa! But eventually you found the lair of the sinister Skull Overlord Xxyrg, and were able to defeat him by knocking him into a gelatinous cube with a lucky critical hit. Bruised but successful, you made it back to the nearby city of Coney Island and claimed your reward.
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