| As a baby you were stolen from your parents by a band of accountants and raised in a dark and wild cave. They regarded you as one of their own, but the time came for you to make your own name as a professional Thief. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Claremont in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Hamonrye you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Duke of Schmalbion's simple half-brother had been kidnapped by lizardmen, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. Everything was hunky-dory until you got lost in a pyramid -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet Greyhawk Army knife +1 in a beholder's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some bullywugs into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the ankle. But, you put on your brave face, and made your way through the caverns and caves to where the Vampire Witchlord Wrathcoccyx held court over his horde of fat orphans, and with uncountable swings of your pike (and a few well-placed attacks of opportunity), you finally slew the horrible wierdo and rode back to town to claim your glory (and reward).
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