| Due to a misunderstanding, your aunt enrolled you in Claremont Wizard School at a young age. (You were actually just interested in card tricks.) Still, you graduated with high marks, and set out on your first adventure as a full-fledged Wizard. At the tiny tavern on the outskirts of the Village of Stubborn Mule, you were trapped in a conversation with a man who had clearly had more than his fill of root beer. He told you about the great plague of salamanders that had beset the entire region of Marmosettia, and of the rumor that the evil Barbarian Baaaal was the source of the unpleasantness. You resolved to find the villain and dispatch him, mostly to get the drunk guy to shut up. You were doing really well until you got your face caught in a vending machine and had to gnaw it off to escape. Fortunately, you don't need that to be a hero... but you will sort of miss it. Bruised but unbroken, you readied your nunchuks and marched forth into the darkness, where you were immediately captured by the Death Sorcerer Spitesun's army of tattooed skeletons. They hauled you before their master, but got bored and wandered off during his long gloating speech. Seeing your chance, you pushed the evil creep into his own sphere of annihilation, and escaped to claim your reward from the grateful people of Crunkleford.
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