| It was hard growing up as a farmhand's son in the tiny hamlet of Deaf Chicken, in the land of Olivehawk. The other children mocked you because of your glasses and asthma, but you would have the last laugh when you grew up to be a mighty Wizard! (Which you did.) One fateful day, you were strolling through the quiet village of Mudhole when you met the town cook. That worthy begged you to try and rescue the Duke of Febreezia's tattooed homie, who had been kidnapped by ents. Having little to do except save the world from an evil sorcerer or whatever, you took the quest. Everything was going great but then you wandered into a room totally full of gypsies, plus a flesh golem, which is weird because you would have figured they'd have killed each other. They made a pretty good attempt at killing you, though. But all that drama couldn't stop you. You'd never given up on anything, not even your childhood quest to scour all the mongoose in your hometown of Molehill. So you kept going, right into the tannery of the evil Devil Lord Xxyrg. Fortunately for you, he was out for lunch at the time, so you could grab some loot and get out before you got your face handed to you.
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