| You grew up the son of a seamstress, but decided such a profession was lacking in excitement. After much hard training, (if you never play hopscotch again, it'll be too soon) you finally became a mighty Fighter. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Crunkleford in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Shaffly-on-Surrey you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Poo-bah's drunken grandfather had been kidnapped by jerks, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. You were kickin' ass and chewin' bubblegum until you got lost in a necropolis -- all the walls looked exactly the same! You did find a sweet spoon +1 in a cockatrice's lair, though, and were able to intimidate some skeletons into telling you where their boss's hideout was. Right before they stabbed you in the groin. You holed up in a small storeroom with a lockable door, and spent several weeks resting until your hitpoints were back to full. Then, keeping a careful eye out for dire dwarves, you made your way to the lair of Grim King Goldthwait and the object of your quest. You thought he nearly had you when he summoned a foul owlbear to his aid, but you put paid to the beast with your yo-yo and knocked the villain screaming into a antlion pit with a well-placed kick to the leg. At last, the treasure was yours!
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