| Life was hard as a young man growing up in the city of Yarbleshire, and it became even harder when you had your heart stolen by a squat, tattooed cook. You became a Thief, in order to steal it back (with interest). Having heard many rumors about how Kilmer was being systematically sacked by a band of marauding jocks (who had already looted and burned the villages of Quirm, Foobar, and Cheddarwurst), and the ludicrous reward being offered for the face of their leader, you decided it was finally time to put your mettle to the test. You weren't having any problems until you got attacked by more tramps than you could handle. You were lucky to get out of there with your leg intact! Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's pyramid, dispatching badgers left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Terror Sorcerer Diablolo. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your handaxe into his arm. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil dweeb was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Zevroozlchester.
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