| You grew up on the huge streets of the great Topaz City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. As you wandered the back alleys of Hamlet (and let's face it, most of that place is back alleys), a hand covered your mouth while a blade pushed gently at your ribs. You let yourself be dragged into a pitch-dark abandoned pig stable. A sultry female voice introduced herself as Viridian Dire wind. She asked you to undertake a quest to recover the Lord of Shuntington's lost hissing cockroach, Cutesworth. Reasoning it was the best quest you'd get until you leveled up a bit, you agreed to help. Everything was hunky-dory but then you wandered into a room totally full of bullywugs, plus a shoggoth, which is weird because you would have figured they'd have killed each other. They made a pretty good attempt at killing you, though. However, you knew you'd never be a mighty adventurer if you let a little setback like that stop you, and damned if you were going to end up a chambermaid in some crummy backwater like Sudoku or Madlib. So you pressed onward until you discovered the lair of the Ice Sorcerer Scarsword, and after a long and dramatic battle you successfully put an end to his evil ways. And then you looted the hell out of his hideout.
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