| You grew up on the boring streets of the great Gold City, where contrary to popular belief, the streets are mainly paved with horse dung. Well, at least in your neighborhood. Small wonder you grew up to be a professional Thief. As luck would have it, you found yourself wandering through the sleepy village of Madlib just as the village people (you know, the construction worker, the cop, the Indian) were beset by the evil Lord Diablolo, who had poisoned the town's gerbil population. Against your better judgment (and with the hope of fat loot to come), you agreed to try and bring the villain to justice. At first it was a real breeze, until you dropped your mace in a swinging razor-sharp pendulum and couldn't get it back out. Wouldn't you know it, that was when the hobgoblins showed up. But, unwilling to let that keep you from glory, you gritted your teeth and wielded your scythe, and cut your way through the hordes of jerks that stood between you and your goal. At last you found the lair of Dark Sorcerer Hatredgiant, who quite unexpectedly turned out to be your long-lost daughter, but you killed the douchewad anyway. And thus was the land freed from tyranny, and you earned yourself a fat reward!
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