| As a baby you were stolen from your parents by a band of hobgoblins and raised in a dark and wild cave. They regarded you as one of their own, but the time came for you to make your own name as a professional Thief. As luck would have it, you found yourself wandering through the sleepy village of Dropseat just as the village people (you know, the construction worker, the cop, the Indian) were beset by the evil King Blackfist, who had poisoned the town's tarantula population. Against your better judgment (and with the hope of fat loot to come), you agreed to try and bring the villain to justice. At first it was a real breeze, but you soon were confounded by a fiendish statue-pushing puzzle, and by the time you figured out to solve it, you were pissed as an underfed kitten. But all that drama couldn't stop you. You'd never given up on anything, not even your childhood quest to mop all the earwig in your hometown of Whacking. So you kept going, right into the horse stable of the evil Sorcerer Diabolicus. Fortunately for you, he was out for lunch at the time, so you could grab some loot and get out before you got your foot handed to you.
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