| An ancient prophecy foretold of a child born in the city of Crunkleton with a clarinet-shaped birthmark, who would grow up to be the greatest Wizard ever known. You have a birthmark like that, but at first you were only a sort of okay Wizard. Everyone has to start somewhere, I guess. You headed off into the wild wilderness of Ultramarinebury Grove in search of adventure, and upon your arrival at the great city of Calamaria you heard a town crier shouting about how the the Earl of Delawhat's raven-haired aunt had been kidnapped by bandits, and the massive reward for their rescue. Not wanting to get in the way of the plot railroad, you set out on your new quest. You were rocking the house up until the part where you found yourself trapped between a meat grinder and a sphere of annihilation, with a thulian slaad bearing down upon you. That strawberry was pretty delicious, but it's didn't really make up for the damage to your giblets. Nevertheless, you fought your way through evil overlord's tower, dispatching lizardmen left and right, and finally arrived at the throne room of the Horror Warrior Xxyrg. After a long and dramatic battle, you plunged your handaxe into his thigh. The entire dungeon unexpectedly began to collapse as soon as the evil tool was dead, but you managed to escape with your life, and claimed your reward from the grateful people of Blurstishire.
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